I miss them. A lot. I miss being home as much as I was. I feel terrible for leaving them. I'm rethinking all of this. Is it all worth it?
I question all of this for a few reasons. Two of our kids had check ups over the weekend. Both are dropping on the charts. I'm not home to watch what they eat. I'm not doubting Dan, I'm just......I'm just a control freak that is having a difficult time with all of this.
Both asthmatics are sick again. And I'm not home in the evening to care for them.
I thought this whole working thing would be good for me and now my nerves and guilt are questioning all of that. They are only little once, and I am missing out on a lot already. I see Jack and Sam for just about 2 hours a day. How pathetic is that?
It's just a lot of stress to be the parent to pay the bills, care for the kids half of the day, be the parent to carry the medical insurance......this is shit to be perfectly honest with you.
This to shall pass, I guess.
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1 comment:
I agree that it's hard to be the parents, especially when you have two conflicting needs. I know I couldn't do what you're doing. I think my head would explode if I tried. Hang in there. It'll work out and become more clear to you.
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